"TRYING TO ESCAPE... from ...“TRASH BIN HELL”
Around July 15th of 2022, I received a “Form Letter” from my Trash Collection Service advising that,
“As of August 1, 2022...We Will NO LONGER PICK UP YOUR TRASH.”
Yup...That was all it said. Following on with my usual
*** Redoubtable Instincts*** that it is,
“ALWAYS Better to ACT than to REACT…”,
I immediately started Researching whatever the BIG Local Corporation Trash Companies were using for their Trash Bins. I did this by peeking out the Window and checking up and down the street as my Neighbors parked THEIR Trash Bins curb-side.
I finally decided after much flogging of all the “County Certified Waste Companies” upon One In Particular, mostly because their Name and Phone was Glommed on a Sticker Stuck to my NDN’s Trash Bin.
So I decided that we should make it easy on everyone and Kill Two Trash Bins at the Same Time with the SAME Company ...Twice Weekly.
S
o Far… So Good... Right? Yeah well, Read On ...THIS gets interesting because regardless of WHICH Waste Management Service we’d wind up with, one way or another, We would NEED to Get a Brand New LARGE TRASH BIN.
And THIS is the Point Where I Fell Right Off The Face of The Earth because The Lil’ Woman said,
“
You know, Honey, Since the Utilities have ALWAYS been in MY NAME for the Last Fifty Years that we’ve been together, I... Want to Participate in this Decision Making Process, too…”
So… I tried
NOT to Smile and
NOT look at her
“TOO Kinda Funny…” You Know? And so I replied,
“
Suuuure, Baby Sweet… So. How about looking us up a
96 Gallon Trash Bin and let’s get
The Best One you can find…” and She smiled approvingly. And right then, I decided to just let the whole thing go at that.
And THAT was One Big “WTF WAS I THINKING?” Kind of Mistake Moment ! Because pretty soon , since
"Time Flies" ...
it was leading right up to the Very Last Week in July when I was getting a bit nervous and asking,
“Say Baby Doll…
Any Word yet from Amazon about WHEN that TRASH BIN will be getting here? You know, We’ve only got until just before Monday August 1st …. that New Company starts doing their Trash Pick Ups, because you know,
THEY WON’T PICK UP TRASH IN PLASTIC BAGS SITTING BY THE ROADSIDE.”
And there it was…
I could see that AWFUL, Blank Stare. And then she slowly whispered,
“Uuuuh… Eeerrr… Hunnnyyy ... I thought that YOUUUUU were going to Order One.” Then there was that Sheepish Oh Sh*T oH sH*t Grin… OMG!
In that very instant…
I Made a MAD DASH over to my Laptop and immediately got on AMAZON. I Churned through a Whole Raft of 96 Gallon Trash Bins. looking for the
First One that
maybe would arrive here
BEFORE August 1st, 2022.
I found
ONLY ONE and So…
I Banged That Buy Button after making only a scant reading of One Comment: “
Fast, EARLY” Delivery…” without realizing until much later that the
Seller had made ONLY ONE ON-LINE SALE… EVER.
Well of
COURSE ...It HAD to happen THIS Way... (Thank You, Heisenberg...) RIGHT? And of course... August 1st Came and Went...
and that TOTER BLACK-N-BLUE 96 Gallon Trash Bin NEVER ARRIVED!!!
Usually
I Never have
Any problems with A
ny of my Amazon Orders…
Never that is ... Right up until “
Heisenberg”Jumps Up and
JAMS ME about something
REALLY Important and
it Bites Me On The A** with THIS issue.
So I call
THAT Amazon Customer Service Dude
Over in India ...And He Was GREAT… Because He Canceled that Original Order and He Refunded ALL my Moolah in Less than A Day After THAT.
I immediately ordered
ANOTHER TOTER BIN, but THIS Time I bought it
DIRECTLY FROM TOTER via Amazon. Three days later around 1:00 PM, I saw this
HUGE Semi-Truck from a Tampa Freight Carrier come S
creeching to a HALT almost completely blocking off the entire road.
I came out in my Yard and watched with Great Anticipation as dropped off
One, Huge, Banged Up Cardboard Box that I reflexively Signed For and then I managed to *Wrangle* it up into my Driveway.
Then after he left, I broke open that Box and I could see a
Small Gash ...A 3" Cut that went
RIGHT THROUGH the upper side of the Blue Plastic BIN:
I Did NOT Care...
AND…. I could see that One Wheel was laying loose, down in the bottom of that Big Box…
I Did NOT Care...
Because by then ... I was
SOOOOOOoooooo Glad to SEE That Semi Arrive,
I WOULD HAVE KISSED ALL EIGHTEEN WHEELS ON THAT TRUCK AS IT PULLED AWAY FOR FINALLY DELIVERING THAT DAMNED TRASH BIN TO MY HOME ...JUST BEFORE THE 'NEXT TRASH PICK UP' WOULD BE HAPPENING WITHIN THE HOUR...!
Almost as soon as I signed for it, I managed to get that Broken Wheel Banged Right Back onto the Axle and I Filled that TRASH BIN Right UP to the BRIM with Two Weeks Worth of Garbage…
JUST as my New Waste Service Truck pulled up out front.
I briefly met their 'Peeps' and after he Slapped
One of THEIR Sticky Company Labels onto MY BIN… He Took All My Trash Away…
and THAT Should have been the End of THAT… Right?
But.... Uhhh… NOOOOOOOooooooooooo…
This Last Monday Evening, when I went out to the roadside to Wheel in my Trash Bin
(Sitting there ODDLY TILTED) back onto my Driveway, I could see that One of the Two Wheels was just laying on top of the Bin Lid and t
he Axle was tilting downwards and digging itself into the concrete drive.
Well My GOD… WTF NOW ???….. WTF...DUDE!!!
And so NOW I’ve got to go through all of this Time, Effort and Expense to FIX something that should
NEVER have been So Poorly Designed in the First Place… and I have to perform yet anothe
r “MRRSM OVER- ENGINEERED FIX TO PERFECT A LASTING SOLUTION TO SOMEONE ELSE'S PROBLEM".
And of course, that means having Buy yet another
TOTER Wheels & New Axle Kit along with getting New Lengths of 5/8” Smooth Steel Rod and some 5/8” X 11 TPI Lock-Nut Fasteners and Wide S/S Washers.
It also means that I have to get an Expensive SAE Tap & Die Set capable of Chasing NEW 5/8” X 11 TPI on BOTH Ends of a Galvanized Stock Steel Rod with EXCESS Length
(jik) a 24” Long Threaded 5/8” X 11 TPI Threaded, Stainless Steel Rod will
NOT Properly Do The Job.
Here is What Arrived On That Day:
Here is EVERYTHING that is COMING to FIX IT:
And... Here is EVERYTHING ELSE I need to Re-Engineer a Fail and Fool Proof Axle and Wheel Combo of my OWN MAKING:
And I'm Thinking that I'd Better Watch THESE Videos to Tune Up on How To Cut New 5/8” X 11 Threads onto a 5/8” X 24” Galvanized Steel Rod
I like Adam’s Videos on Metal and Machinist Work and THIS one is Spot On:
And for The Full Monty for Taps, Dies and Thread Chasers:
-=The End=-