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Has an oil well and refinery in his yard.
 
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Knows Canada is way more beautiful than the US
 
Can climb any curb like a boss
 
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Reactions: SnowBlazer
Uses contradictory statements.
 
Is a master hula hooper
 
Is gonna give me a pile of cash !
 
sees the Krispy Creme sign all lit up and the donuts are on him ! all you care to eat too. He says coffee is extra though :(
 
Knows that cream and sugar cost extra too
 
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Has lots of cream
 
Dyes his beard red
 
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Flies cross country just to see if the local water tastes different
 
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Fought two leprechauns and won
 
Was beat up by a 4 year old girl yesterday
 
Gently pets random strangers to see their reactions
 
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Reactions: Mooseman
Has misunderstood the "birds and the bees". Married a bird and cheated with a bee.
 
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Got confused during tag and is still hiding from the 2012 game at Christmas
 
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leaves his spare gas can on the back of his rig, "the build", hoping his brakes work better than the tailgater.
 
Owns a platypus, thinking it's a mutant duck.
 
Wrestles gaters just for fun.
 
Wrestles worms and loses.
 
Is scared of worms, even the gummi kind.
 
Owns a cock fighting ring.
 
Is such a terrible cook that he burns the salad.
 
Knows how to make Ice soup.
 
Has a scar on his butt that he will NOT talk about.
 
Thinks my butt is sexy.
 
Wished he was hung like a moose.
 
Wears a strap-on.
 
Is allergic to whitewater
 
Brags that he owns a ceeeement pond.
 
Stands on toilet so he can say he is high on pot.
 
Gives himself swirlies to wash his hair
 
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