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[Mooseman]

Has been collecting beard clippings since puberty.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Fully understands what all those bright colors mean to me

 

[Mooseman]

Is colourblind

 

[Capote]

Has a bowl of snapped manifold bolts for breakfast with lots of 75w90.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Once ran 16.2 ....



In the 1/8 mile

 

[Mooseman]

Keeps using the same piece of toilet paper for a week at a time.

 

[Blackwater]

bleeds maple syrup.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Smiles for the camera while secretly flipping it off

 

[Mooseman]

Happily gives directions to tourists to the world's biggest ball of string.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Takes daily naps to keep his mind sharp for his nightly crime fighting duties

 

[Mooseman]

Is the little known superhero, Crabman

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Once got crabs from one of "those" girls, but quickly fought them off using a lighter and a can of lysol as a flamethrower on his crotch

 

[Capote]

Once used his long braided pubic hair as a recovery strap.

 

[Mooseman]

Stares down ants and loses.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Fights the moon every night and wins

 

[Mooseman]

Is too cheap to buy people meds and uses pet meds.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Got pulled over three times in one day, but never got a ticket

 

[Mooseman]

Stalks cops in donut shops.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Challenged a toddler on a big wheel to a race and lost

 

[Redbeard]

Knows how to "let the air out' of a big wheel to even the odds.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Rode a humpback whale for thirteen days during its breeding season

 

[Capote]

Wanted to fly across the Atlantic on a paper mache Cessna, drowned 2min & 32sec later...

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Helped build the Cessna and was along for the ride

 

[Blackwater]

His nickname is Yard Bird.

 

[Capote]

Once wrestled a snail.... And lost.

 

[Mooseman]

Once raced a snail and lost.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Likes to eat snails

 

[Redbeard]

Used to be in a band called 'lost dog'. You probably saw his posters.

 

[Mooseman]

Has the most beautiful speaking voice but nobody listens to him because he does radio commercials.

 

[Capote]

Likes to shop at Walmart in a pair of stockings and heels.

 

[Mooseman]

Is mourning Adam West"s passing by wearing the same original bat costume all week.

 

[Blackwater]

Wears the same batman underwear since he was seven.

 

[Mooseman]

Wears Robin underwear because nobody wears them so they're cheaper.

 

[Redbeard]

Likes the all new Star Trek underwear because they hold klingons the best.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Has skid marks in all his underwear

 

[Mooseman]

Doesn't wear underwear to avoid skid marks.

 

[Capote]

Prefers a thong.

 

[Mooseman]

Looked to see my pink fuzzy thong.

 

[Capote]

Sells his used thongs on the internet to creeps.

 

[HARDTRAILZ]

Is the one secretly buying the thongs