Corrupt a Wish!

HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
Poof...You are Bill Gates but you decide with all your money to fly to Mars and are never heard from again.

Wish I had a good place to sleep at work
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Paf, you're sitting in a comfy lay z boy just snoozing away... in the boss' office

Wish I had the body of a 20 year old again
 

HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
Bang--You got the body of a 20 year old, but the mind of a 112 yr old with deep alzheimer's

I wish I had money for a good steak dinner tonight
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Boom, you have the money for a good steak dinner but nothing else so you have no clothes and you're thrown out of the restaurant.

I wish i could take a trip around the world
 

Redbeard

Member
Jan 26, 2013
3,466
Boom, your taking a trip around the world. But your latest buddy Mathew, the Hurricane, is traveling with you tho and taking you along at 145 mph. Round and round you go. Think of the free airfare you get.

I wish I had a kite to fly.

redbeard

“The difference between genius and stupidity is: genius has its limits.”
 
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Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Poof, you have a kite... made of cast iron.

I wish my house would just go into a sink hole.
 

HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
Poof...House is in the sinkhole, but you are down there with it and have to eat cat food for 3 weeks while we dig you out...

I wish I could bowl a 300 game tonight
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
W00t, you bowl a perfect 300 game but during your victory dance, you spill your beer, slip, hit your head, get a bad concussion and now you can't remember that game.

I wish I would lose 100 lbs.
 

HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
Wham...You lose 100 lbs, but its only in your legs so they can't hold up the rest of you and you must crawl everywhere dragging your tiny feeble legs.

I wish I had more time to get stuff done.
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Womp... You have all the time to do all that stuff you want but the wife gives you so much more to do, you outlive everybody, even the human race, and you're now alone.

I wish I could go on a nice long snowmobiling trip with my sons.
 

HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
Poof---Snowmobile trip is going perfectly, riding along and the snow gives way and you are entering a cave with your sons just behind, down, down you go until you think it has to end, but it won't you ride and ride in this steep dark cave and have no way to turn or stop. Hours slide by until finally you are out of fuel and coasting down this endless cave. Then you arrive at a room with no exits but the way you came and no fuel to ride out, so you must climb out. 3 weeks and 100 lbs lighter you emerge to find the world has ended and you are the sole survivors.

I wish I had a new garage in my backyard
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Poof, out of the sky, this beautiful 6 bay garage with lifts, full tools and equipment, bathroom with shower, loft and kitchen floats down from the sky. Unfortunately, it lands right on your wife, who has the deed to the property in her name, which now includes the garage on the property. She has willed the property to her lover who promptly kicks you out.

I wish for just one bottle of the absolute best beer in the world.
 
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Capote

Supporting Donor
Member
Jul 14, 2014
24,227
Atlanta, GA
*Poof* That majestic legendary oh-so rare best beer in all of the world appears before you shimmering and glowing in all it's profoundness! You drink it all, "Boy that was good!", but once the bottle is empty you notice something in the bottom of the glass. A small note in red lettering reads: "Cyanide was infused with this beer, oops! Hope you enjoyed!". You shortly croak a few seconds later.

I wish I had a Turbo setup on my Trailblazer.
 
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HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
Wham...TURBO ENGAGED. You got a badass turbo setup and its turning out north of 800 HP, but the rear end explodes everytime you give it more than 10% throttle so you have to baby it and cant even run as fast as stock.

I wish I had a bowling alley in my basement
 
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Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Paf, the most advanced and perfect bowling alley appears in your basement but the fiercest storm comes with biblical amounts of rain and floods it out.

I wish I was a hockey player in the NHL making millions.
 
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Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
I guess I got my wish!

I wish I could get the Saab painted
 

HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
You get it painted but it in pink with purple stars and an airbrushed unicorn

I wish I could be in two places at once
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Wham, you have a clone so you are in two places but being a copy, it's not quite all there, actually pretty dumb, tries to rob a bank but the Ford getaway truck goes into REP and won't go faster than 10mph, gets caught, blames you and you both go to jail.

Wish I could buy a beautiful house in Nova Scotia facing the ocean.
 

HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
Poof...Beautiful house, facing the ocean, BUT its on a cliff and the day you move in an earthquake shakes it right off the cliff into the water.

Wish i had a houseboat:wink:
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Yay. Houseboat! Big wave sinks it and you wind up on a desert island.

I wish I could be sitting on a sunny beach with an ice cold beer in my hand right now.
 

HARDTRAILZ

Moderator
Nov 18, 2011
49,665
Boom...You got your wish....but right now is great and then 30 seconds later, you are back to where you were before...Bah Humbuggers

I wish I could double my salary
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Woop, your salary is doubled but the IRS audits you and says you owe back taxes to 1953, even though you didn't even exist then, so you are broke.

I wish I would never get tired.
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
C'mon. somebody corrupt my wish!
 

Redbeard

Member
Jan 26, 2013
3,466
Poof, you're now never tired, but now that you are never tired you never get another break or lunch off at work.

I wish my coffee cup never went empty.
 

Mooseman

Moderator
Dec 4, 2011
25,257
Ottawa, ON
Wham! You have this most beautiful mug and is refilled with the best coffee in the world by the most beautiful woman carrying a carafe made of gold but she complains CONSTANTLY about how heavy and tiring it is so you stop drinking the coffee so she would shut the hell up!

I wish I could eat as much as I want without gaining any weight.
 
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